Mercury Retrograde (Astrology is So Cool)

We are experiencing an astrological action known as a Mercury Retrograde.  The following article is a little simplistic but give one a good idea of what it is and what happens during a retrograde.  Warning . . . there are going to be things in the article that sound really familiar . . .



Mercury Retrograde

The time has come to tell you all about the dreaded Mercury Retrograde.  I think the best way to define this astrological action is to tell you a little story.  Shortly after I got my drivers’ license I was driving along a street that ran parallel to a train track.  A train was coming up behind me heading in the same direction.  As the train matched my car’s speed I suddenly, and only for two heartbeats, felt like I was going backwards and my brain went into total confusion.  As quickly as the train’s speed changed, the sensation subsided and everything was fine.  This is the basic action that is taking place when the planet Mercury goes retrograde.  The orbit speed of the Earth and Mercury are exactly the same for a short while, giving the impression that Mercury is turning backwards.  When you add the fact that Mercury is the planet of communication into the equation you began to get an idea of where this is all going.


Three to four times a year we will have a Mercury Retrograde.  This action last approximately three to four weeks.  Try to imagine the word “Communication” in the broadest sense possible and you will begin to grasp the concept.  A very wise and talented astrologer told me many years ago that people who are terminally ill will choose to cross over during a Mercury Retrograde.  My Mother and Father crossed on the first day of a Mercury Retrograde, thirty-three years apart.  I don’t know of any specific cause for this, but I have tracked it for many years and am always dumbfounded when it appears to be true.


Of course, there is communication between people which, at this time, can go to hell in a hand basket.  You will find that your mouth and your brain are not connected.  Watch the news anchors during a Mercury Retrograde.  These normally articulate people are suddenly tongue-twisted and appear at times to babble like idiots.  Arguments between trusted friends, relatives and sometimes complete strangers will blossom like spring flowers and turn into major thunderstorms in a matter of seconds.  If possible, don’t sign any legal papers or make binding agreements.  You may have a court case scheduled.  Stall if possible, because chances are you will have to redo, rewrite or reschedule.

Always back up your computer files because if you don’t you will regret it when your computer crashes like a meteor. Don’t buy anything that has any type of electrical or electronic component if you can possibly put it off until Mercury goes direct.  Chances are you will wish you had waited a little longer.  Your auto, which has never given you a moments trouble, will break belts, overheat, do anything to cost you time and money.


Know that going to Wal-Mart can easily turn into an obstacle course of gigantic proportions.  It will start in the parking lot where people on cell phones will try to engage you in a rousing game of “Chicken” for the same parking space.  You will know it in the store when people (you included) will be standing in an aisle staring, dazed and confused, at the place where your favorite cheap paper towels usually are but are no longer.  You will know it in the store when sweet little old ladies suddenly seem to have flashbacks to the most warrior-like past life they have ever had and try to mow you down with their spiffy little electric carts.  You will know it when the cashier can’t get the register to take your check, credit or debit card without a major hassle.


All right!  Now that I have you all terrified of Mercury Retrograde, let me point out a few more things.  Life goes on.  Knowing about the retrograde and the possibility of the snafus that can happen immediately make it easier to deal with in all aspects.  Forewarned is forearmed I always say.  You may not be able to avoid signing important papers or buying a new computer.  If you can’t wait then you can’t wait.  Understand that there may be more glitches than average but nothing that can’t be resolved, eventually.


Another possibility is that some one you haven’t heard from in years and years may get in touch with you or you may feel compelled to contact someone from your past.  Many times things that are in your past that you thought would never work out come to fruitition, culmination or conclusion.  I have only a few minutes ago got off the phone with my brother.  He was the victim of a stroke many months ago.  His recovery has been excellent in some aspects but a little slower in others.  He filed for disability several months ago but had heard nothing and was mentally and emotionally gearing up for a court fight.  He called to tell me that he had just checked his bank balance and almost fainted.  His balance was several thousand dollars more than he was expecting.  After some thought (it’s Sunday- no actual humans to contact) he realized that, without written notice, he was approved for his disability and a large chunk of cash was deposited in his account from the Social Security Administration. So.  It’s not all bad, this Mercury Retrograde.  A few tips:  Breathe deeply on a regular basis, develop your sense of humor to the max and repeat after me “This too shall pass, this too shall pass……”


About Jerre B. Shoemake

Author of Turnipseed's Bookstore.
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2 Responses to Mercury Retrograde (Astrology is So Cool)

  1. Nadine Battaglia says:

    Jerre! What a treat it was to find your fine tutorial on the mysterious Mercury Retrograde! As a matter of fact, my cellphone was lost or stolen and had been used extensively. I had the list of numbers that the thief had called and texted — it was sitting on my desk for a month, but it was not till last night that I saw, for the first time, the telephone number of the person who stole my phone and minutes! The dummy called his own house! I should take care of calling names because I didn’t even see it for a whole month! Enjoy the Mercury Madness kids!

    • > Nadine I’m so sorry about your phone but the month’s delay says a lot about Mercury Retrograde. Maybe the cops can track the bozo and give him a real hard time. I’m going to try to post something everyday. It may be only a little bit. Check it when you get a chance and let know what you think! Good luck with the phone. Jerre

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